Lonely Little Boy...
Friday, February 24, 2006

The other day I went out in the sawmill yard (our house is located in the compound of a decrepit, rusting overgrown sawmill just a few yards from the Berbice River) to dig some nice black dirt for my chrysanthemum. There were a few young boys playing "tah" in the sawmill yard and one of the little boys, Jacob (6,7? years old. I wonder if he would know if I asked him. He comes from a very broken home. He used to live with his mother, who died last year. Because of her immoral lifestyle, some suspected HIV was the cause. Now he lives down the road with his father, an Indian man with long hair who seems to be a hard person.)

Jacob came running toward me, his eyes bright "Yoh dig durty? Yoh dig durty?" Rather bewildered at his word usage, I finally replied, "I'm digging dirt" Holding up a handful I said, "This is dirt. Dirty is what my hands get when I hold dirt."

"Satan de in de dirt?"

"No. God made the dirt." Our conversation proceeded on how God made dirt and roots. I showed him the roots of the plants. He "helped" me get more dirt by continuing to pull up the weeds and give them to me to take the dirt off the roots. ...

"Who made you Jacob?"

"GOD mek me. He put de blood insie me body and mek de bones and mek me skin turn sof..."

"Why did God make you?" (He did not understand the word "why?")

"Me mother mek me....... Me mother is dead" He looked at me quite solemnly.

"I know. I'm sorry" We continued to talk. It was just amazing to me how he wanted to talk - about his grandfather praying, about God who "trow down de water from de sky" When I finally walked back inside with my potful of dirt, my heart said, "That was a precious mercy. Thank you God - for that opportunity, because I was not even looking for it" In fact I was thinking about "being busy at home," and wondering how much opportunity to reach out there really is - there are opportunities to serve right
at home of course, but also to minister to people that God is pleased to bring to us.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."
- Eph. 2:8-10 ESV

A Poem about Perseverance

I am faint, I cannot hold Thee
The arm of flesh shall fail me
My heart is wooden, cold and dull
A hopeless voice says, "You shall fall"
Unto my weary soul.

Oh, powerless am I to hold
To that which is eternal
My feeble grasps cannot enfold
Those hopes of joy supernal
Thus faints my soul.

If my endurance rests on me,
O God! No hope have I,
But woefully to wane from Thee
Hollow sighing till I die -
Unless Thou holdst my soul.

My Lord! My God! Thou Sovereign One,
Help me see those mighty bands
That bind me to Thy righteous Son
Fastened by Thy mighty hands -
In this may rest my soul.

I have no power - Thou hast all
All my strivings turn to dust
And in my dust-bound self I'd fall
But thou hast promised and art just
By grace to hold my soul.

I rest in Thee. In Thee I trust
Predestined, Thou hast called me,
And in Christ Jesus made me just,
And thou shalt glorify me,
And never loose my soul.

These are the mighty iron bands,
All by sovereign grace bound fast.
These are the never-failing hands,
That uphold me to the last.
Believe Thy God, my soul.

- Alyssa Colby

...nothing like a job well done!

Monday, September 11, 2006

...nothing like a job well done!

Quite a few years ago, a group of us missionary kids used to gather together to do music with one of the missionary moms. We learned alot of "Patch the Pirate" (Ron Hamilton) songs. The chorus of one that I still remember well goes something like this:

"It's good old fashioned, callous-makin' back-bone-breakin' work
That's the secret formula - it's plain, hard, work!
I work all day; I work all night; I'm up with the mornin' sun
'Cause nothin' brings me satisfaction like a job well done!

The other day the song was going through my head. When I got to the last line I started thinking... "Nothing brings me satisfaction like a job well done..." That is how I am. I love to start a task, whether sewing, cleaning, baking or writing, and finish it well. But there is one work that was better done than any job I've done. When it was done, the One who accomplished it said, "It is finished."

Whenever I think of that song now, I think of the finished work of Christ. His death on the cross for my sins and his resurrection for my justification, totally satisfied the justice of God. It should totally satisfy me. What can I do to make up for my sin? Nothing. "It is finished."

There at the cross of Christ, my salvation was worked, and worked perfectly. It was a job well done. Nothing should bring me greater satisfaction. I not only believe in this, I must satiate my soul-thirst with it.

"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God's righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins. It was to show his righteousness at the present time, so that he might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus." - Rom. 3:23-26 ESV

It is finished!

His Mighty Hand

My Lord, how easily doth pride rise within my heart!

And, lo, how eas'ly Thou canst humble 'neath the weight of all Thy mercies.

O dump from heaven daily that sweet load upon my head,

that naught but praise might lift from 'neath its heavy glory.

Lord, Thy mercies ever humble me;

Yea, they ever lift me up to joyous heights where I am near Thee.

Thy hand is mighty – therefore may I lowly be beneath it.

Thy hand is mighty – O then lift me up to Thee!

-October 27, 2005


For thus says the One who is high and lifted up,
who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy:
“I dwell in the high and holy place,
and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit,
to revive the spirit of the lowly,
and to revive the heart of the contrite.
- Isaiah 57:15 ESV

My Testimony
The Story of My Life and the Mercy of God

I was raised by Christian parents, and knew about the Bible and Jesus from an early age. But just like the Bible says , "Surely I was sinful from birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me." As I grew up, the sinfulness of my heart began to show itself in anger, hatred, and fear. I hated my brother so much that I would not be near him.

At children's ministry events at our church, I would go in the side room with those who wanted to be saved and the lady would pray with us, but I did not understand what was happening.
One time I prayed along. I wondered if I was saved. I began to believe that if you pray a prayer - and "really mean it" - you will be saved. In fearful moments, I would try to pray a good prayer of salvation, in case I might die suddenly. I didn't realize that this was a way of trying to earn salvation. As I grew older, I only became more self-centered and fearful.

When I was ten, our family went to Guyana as missionaries. Being in a foreign country only increased my fears, but I kept them inside. While my parents ministered in Guyana for our first term, I didn't care about missions. For me, life in Guyana was hanging out with my friends. My MK friends and I despised "girliness" as weakness. I started to wear unfeminine clothes. I did foolish things. I was moody and self-centered. I disliked my family and secretly thought I was better than them.

One Sunday, at church in Guyana, I wasn't paying attention to the service and thought it would be a good time to make sure of my salvation, so I mentally prayed the best prayer I could think of to a God I didn't know or love, trying to concentrate and "really mean it". Then I wrote the date in my Bible so I could look at it next time I doubted my salvation. I tried to read my Bible and pray every day. It made me feel like a good Christian. My parents thought I should be baptized, so I complied. I wrote out my testimony, thinking that I was saved by my prayer, and was baptized.

After four years in Guyana, we returned to the states for one year of home ministry. I remember during this time, beginning to feel convicted about my hatred toward my brother, feeling guilty about different areas of my life - but at the same time enjoying the simple pleasures of life in America. I went to youth group, would discuss "spiritual things" with my friends and felt quite mature, but never considered that my relationship with God was not one of faith and love, but one of blind groping and guilty fear.


When we returned to Guyana in 2003, my dad pastored a church plant there, and life went on. One Sunday afternoon, the familiar, but horrible hatred and resentment began to rise up inside me. I said nothing, but felt helpless before the hatred that was flooding over my heart. In deep despair, I went to my room, and began reading my Bible in Psalm 51. "Have mercy on me O God according to your unfailing love, according to your great compassion, blot out my transgressions... " It impressed me as exactly what I needed. Then I remembered 1 John - the book that bothered me. First John said a lot about love - love that I didn't have. I found one of the passages about love in chapter 3.
"We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him." (1 John 3:14-15 NIV)
The words cut to my heart. Suddenly the foundation I had been trying to build my life on - my goodness, my spirituality – it all crumbled away. I saw that I was a murderer and deserved hell. It was terrifying, but also freeing. For years I had tried to convince myself that I was right with God, and now, the rags that I had tried to cover my sinful heart with had been stripped away. I was glad to have my ugly heart uncovered. Now I knew that everything that kept me from really trusting Christ had been taken away.I continued reading..."This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us..." (1 John 3:16 NIV) It was what I had heard all my life – but now I knew what it meant. Jesus is able and willing to save sinners like me. He loved me and died for me. What more did I need? I began to cry. I didn't have to think of the right words. There was my Savior dying on a cross. HE was my salvation. "Jesus save me" It was a very sweet thing to cast my soul on God and ask for mercy just because of Jesus. I knew that trusting in Jesus, I would not be condemned. He said, "Whoever comes to me I will never drive away," and "Whoever believes in Him will never be put to shame."
What a difference it makes to have Christ! In Him there is power to love! Yes, I have stumbled many times, but that day was the first of many times that I turned to Christ and rested in His perfect salvation. I have learned that Christians are not people who believed once, or prayed a prayer once and then try to be good. Christians are people who believe in Christ and then keep on believing in Him as their only righteousness.

God could have left me to die in my own self-righteousness, but He didn't. How great is His mercy! He gave me faith to believe on His Son Jesus Christ and be saved - because faith and salvation are not from myself, but a gift of God's grace.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them ." - Ephesians 2:8-10 ESV

~ ~ ~

God has provided salvation in Jesus Christ. I have found this Jesus and oh what a Savior He is! Then I find that part of believing this good news is taking it to others so that they can say, "How great is His mercy!". Even if it means laying down my life.

This is how we know what love is:

Jesus Christ laid down His life for us,

and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers .

What I Believe

This is a pretty thorough summary of what I believe. I tried to have proof-texts for everything, some shorter texts are quoted. For the others, clicking on the links takes you to the texts in English Standard Version on gnpcb.org - to save time if you want to look up a verse.

I believe in the eternality, (Ps. 90:1-2)

tri-unity, (Matt. 28:19-20)

omnipotence, (Gen. 17:1)

omnipresence, (Jer. 23:24)

omniscience (Ps. 50:11, Acts 1:24)

sovereignty (Job 42:2,Prov. 16:33, Rom. 9:10-29)

and God-centeredness (Ps. 23:3, Isa. 48:11)

of God. (Ps. 46:10)

I believe that Jesus Christ is God's eternally begotten Son, and is One with God.
(John 1:1-3,18; John 10:30)

I believe God created the universe by the word of His power, in six literal days, (Genesis 1, Hebrews 11:3) and that man is created in God's image to glorify Him, (Isa. 43:7) but fell into sin. (Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned - Rom. 5:12)

I believe in the total depravity/sinfulness of mankind since the fall. I believe that every person, excepting Jesus Christ, is born in sin

("Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. - Ps. 51:5 )

I believe that the root of sin is preferring other things to God. because of the hardness and blindness of our hearts to His glory, and so failing to glorify Him as He deserves. (Rom 1:18-23, 3:23)

I believe that since the fall, all people born are spiritually dead, and are powerless to do anything good until they are born again. That unbelievers can do nothing to please God, even in what may appear to be good deeds.

("For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.”- Rom. 14:13)
("Those who are in the flesh cannot please God." Rom. 8:8)

and that man by himself cannot even choose to believe in Christ, until God gives new birth to his spirit and gives life to his dead soul. (Eph. 2:1-3)

I believe that before God created the world, He chose whom He would save, (Eph. 1:3-12) not based on their personal merit, but based wholly upon His free and sovereign grace.

(For he says to Moses, “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.” So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God, who has mercy. - Rom. 9:15-16)
…that God elected some to salvation and others to destruction, in order to display both the glory of His mercy and the glory of His righteous wrath. (Rom 9:18-24)

I believe that God has not merely provided a way of salvation and left it up to mankind to choose to be saved, but that He has provided a way of salvation in His Son Jesus Christ, and provides for His elect all that is required of them to be saved – new birth/new heart, repentance of sin and faith in Jesus. (Eph. 2:1-9, Ezek. 11:19)

I am saved, not because I chose to believe in God, but because He chose me and enabled me to believe in Him by giving me new birth.
("But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God." - John 1:12-13 ESV, Acts 13:48, Rom 8:28-30, James 1:18, I Cor. 1:27-30)

I believe in the substitutionary atonement of Jesus Christ, and that His finished work of dying on a cross bearing God’s wrath for our sins and being raised for our justification is all-sufficient to save those who trust it wholly. (Rom 3:21-26, Rom. 4:5, 23-25, 2 Cor. 5:21)

I believe that hearing the gospel of Jesus Christ is absolutely necessary for people's salvation, ("For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.”- Rom. 1:16-17)

I believe that faith in the person and work of Jesus Christ is the only way to God, and not any other religious practice, no matter how sincere its followers may be. (John 14:6)

I believe that a person must be born again in order to believe the gospel, and that this is a work of God - specifically the Holy Spirit - that precedes and enables faith. (John 1:13, 3:1-8)
I believe that God saves people by opening their heart to the message of the gospel
(Acts 16:13-14, I Thess. 1:4-5, 2 Thess. 2:13-14)
and drawing them by a kind and sovereign grace to believe. Without this, no one would be saved. Those who do not believe when they hear the gospel, do so because they are blinded by Satan. (2 Cor. 4:3-6)

I believe that born-again children of God will persevere in faith to the end. (Col. 1:23)

(Now I would remind you, brothers, of the gospel I preached to you, which you received, in which you stand, and by which you are being saved, if you hold fast to the word I preached to you—unless you believed in vain. – 1 Cor. 15:1-2)

and that believers sin, but do not continue in a lifestyle of sin. (I John 1:8-9, 1 John 3:4-10)
I believe that God will not lose those whom He has sovereignly saved. (John 10:27-30) and that this truth is not a license to live in un-checked sin because we “will still be saved,” Such an attitude comes from one yet unsaved, because "once saved, always saved" also means "once believing always believing". (1 John 2:24-25) Those who are saved will be kept by God, not just in a mere state of security, but kept in His grace that will work to sanctify their lives, enabling them to keep on believing to the end.

I believe that being a child of God does not make one exempt from trials, sickness, poverty etc., but that God uses these things in the lives of His children to discipline/train them and make them more like Christ. (Heb 12:5-11, Rom. 8:28)

I believe that baptism is, spiritually, the event in which believers are “put into” the body of Christ, (2 Cor. 12:13) represented outwardly by an event in which believers are physically "put into" water in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. (Matt. 28:19-20, Acts 8:36-38)

I believe that women should not be pastors or leaders of the church. (I Cor. 14:3-4) That women are called to teach other women, esp. older to younger (Titus 2:3-5) but not men. (2 Tim. 2:12)
I believe a woman's calling is to be centered on the home.

I believe in the existence of Satan and demons, who continually work to keep unbelievers from believing and tempt believers to sin. (Luke 8:12) but that they do not hinder God’s sovereign design. (2 Cor. 4:3-6.)

I believe in the existence of angels. (Heb. 1:13-14)

I believe that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who came to this earth long ago, will come again and take his people to be with Him forever. (1 Thes.1:9-10, 1 Thes. 4:14-18)

I believe that the final destiny of unrepentant sinners is eternal separation from God in the lake of fire along with the devil and his own (Matt. 25:41),

and that the final destiny of believers is eternal dwelling with God in the new heavens and new earth. (Php. 3:20, Heb. 11:16, 2 Pet. 3:13, Rev. 21)

I hope this is edifying to my readers. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read through it.

All Scripture is from the English Standard Version.

(When we came to Glasgow Village Guyana for our second mission term, God providentially provided us a house to rent by the Berbice River. Living by the river has added plenty of variety, amusement and beauty to our lives over the past three and a half years, and we captured much of it on camera)

It's morning on the river. You never know what might float by - a stray clump of plants...

"MINIATURE ISLAND"

...or something bigger,

"EARLY MORNING -BAUXITE BARGE"

...or something really big!

"TWO SHIPS PASSING IN THE DAY"

By the river, we see God's beautiful creation and are reminded of His covenant...

"END OF THE RAINBOW"

and we see... things mankind created which sure don't match God's creation!

"LOADING OF THE BARGE"

(Sometimes they make a nice picture all together!)

"'STILL LIFE - BULLDOZER, BARGE and RAINBOW'"

I love stormy days by the river. Storms are glorious

"The LORD is slow to anger and great in power, and the LORD will by no means clear the guilty.
His way is in the whirlwind and storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet. - Nahum 1:3 ESV

"GIRL BY RIVER ON STORMY DAY"

And peaceful days are glorious.

"BLUE SKY OVER RIVER"

"DADDY AND MOTHER AT RIVERSIDE LATE AFTERNOON"

"The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims His handiwork..."
- Psalm 19:1 ESV

"MARBLED SKY"


"SUNSET CLOUD AND SWIFTS"


"FIERY SKY"